Recovery was once a term used by activist survivors of deinsitutionalisation of mental health treatment facilities where it was seen as a more person centred alternative to the passive experience of ‘getting rehabilitated’. It was then taken over by the insitutions themselves in an attempt to improve their services. (Not unifrormly regarded as a good thing by activists – some say it was ‘hijacked’ and ‘watered down’) There are debates about how to use it ie ‘recovery in’ (living well with various symptoms) verus ‘recovery from’ (remission of symptoms). This can also be framed as the person’s/client’s view versus the health care professonal’s view of one’s situaton. The author notes how in current psychiatric work she completes various courses and trainings to tick competency boxes showing that she knows how to ‘recover’ patients. She had no problem with that process but as she researched her own and others’ experiences of psychiatric care, she finds a tension between ‘recovery’ and the more profound experience of ‘healing’.