Not only that, they must proceed with humility, recognizing that their judgment about the differences that divide could miss the mark in various ways and that some of their own words and deeds are likely to require their friend’s forbearance. Like love, its source, the forbearance of friends must be mutual, its hope must rest in each other. And like friendship^ love, forbearance tends to generate this mutuality through its own act. It tends to secure the object of its hope through its sacrifice. If I help bear the burden of my friends objectionable difference, neither ignoring its reality, nor discounting its significance, and if I make this sacrifice out of love for him, out of desire for continued union and in hope that these burdens might pass and this union deepen, then I put my love on display, and love tends to elicit love in return. Love offered and recognized, sacrifices made and acknowledged: these tend to create, restore, and perfect friendship^ union. Will these tendencies have these effects in every instance? Past evidence will always be mixed at best, and thus the forbearing cannot know with clear sight what will follow from their acts. They cannot know whether their hope for reconciliation will be fulfilled or whether the forbearance they offer will be returned in kind.